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TWO new additions to the periodic table of chemical elements:
Element Name: WOMAN
Symbol: WO
Atomic Weight: (don't even go there)
Physical properties:
- Generally round in form.
- Boils at nothing and may freeze at anytime.
- Melts whenever treated properly.
- Very bitter if mishandled.
Chemical properties:
- Very active.
- Highly unstable.
- Possesses strong affinity with gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones.
- Volatile when left alone.
- Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food.
- Turns slightly green when placed next to a shinier specimen.
Usage:
- Highly ornamental.
- An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth.
- Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.
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Element Name: MAN
Symbol: XY
Atomic Weight: (180+/-50)
Physical Properties:
- Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily.
- Fairly dense and sometimes flaky.
- Difficult to find a pure sample.
- Due to rust, ageing samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.
Chemical properties:
- Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get.
- Also tends to form strong bonds with itself.
- Becomes explosive when mixed with KD(Element: Child) for prolonged period of time.
Neutralize by saturating with alcohol.
Usage:
- None known.
- Possibly good methane source.
Good specimens are able to produce large quantities on command.
Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.
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